August 25, 2010 § Leave a comment
Pictured: Samson in his great-grandmother's apartment, minutes after taking his first unassisted steps.
Just moments ago professional infant and part-time studio musician, Samson The Baby, took his first steps. "These are the first of many steps I plan to take," Samson said at a press conference following the much-anticipated locomotive event. "While the distance between the armchair and couch was great, I don't plan to rest on this achievement. There's a coffee table just over there, and a cabinet full of stuff that my mom doesn't want me to touch. I don't want to speculate too much at this time." His father then escorted him from the room to change his diaper. Other babies were contacted for comment but had not issued any statements at press time.